Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
