im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Randomize
