He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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