Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
