One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
