brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize