He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
You are a genius and a whore.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
