Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
