sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Randomize