I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
