i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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