my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
