Can Purell be used as lube?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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