I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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