I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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