ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
