i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
