No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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