I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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