Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
