You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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