he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
