yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
