Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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