I wish I could punch you in the face.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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