just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
