You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Randomize
