i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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