The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
