i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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