thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize