I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
