My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
