So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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