I think scott just propositioned me for sex
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
