I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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