He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Randomize
