Christians are straight up FREAKS
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
