Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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