home. puking in laundry basket.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Holy sore nipples Batman
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
