sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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