Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
this just has baby written all over it
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
