i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize