11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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