what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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