Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
We got so high we made milksteak
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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