Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
