New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Randomize
