ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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