I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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